Are you moody?

Last Sunday morning we woke up to a sweet surprise of a snow covered ranch. It was magical in a way. We went to bed and everything looked normal, we woke up to a blanket of newness. I know for those who live where it snows this picture grows old, but for we desert dwellers it is a beautiful gift. Our grandson, Milo, was with us and the delight on his face as Papu pulled open the curtain was priceless.

I love this photo because it is such a great depiction of life. Old, muddy ruts, mixed with fresh covered ground, blue skies mixed with dark clouds, young trees trying to grow, and old trees trying to stay erect...a mixed bag for sure! And my how our moods can change just by focusing on the different views. But, when we look at the whole picture, we see the beauty of an amazing Creator who is constantly doing something new among the old, revealing hope amidst the clouds and revealing the path where it is safe to walk along with the uncharted ground that is yet to be trampled on.

Isaiah 43 reminds us that God is constantly on the move. He is doing brand new things in our familiar lives. Do we see Him? Are we paying attention? He longs to be gracious to us and rises to show us compassion. My prayer daily has become that I would embrace these amazing gifts, no matter what the picture looks like, and trust that He is leading me in His grace and compassion (Isaiah 30), His hand of blessing rests upon me (Psalm 139) and He follows me with His love and mercy (Psalm 23). Focusing here replaces whatever foul mood my nature sinks to (and believe me, it goes there quickly) and fills my heart with hope and joy. Help me to dwell here Spirit! Are you moody? Lift your eyes!

Weird envy

I am so proud of my sisters at Teen Challenge who are hanging in there and doing the work that needs to be done in order to live sober in our pressure filled society. Yesterday I had a moment with them. A moment that was a weird envy. We started talking about where 'they' will be this year for the holidays. We addressed the obvious: not home (which can be good, bad, or both), not with family, not with familiar traditions etc. That can make us feel very homesick for either what we had, or what we wish we had, or what we think others have in our fantasy minds. But then we were all invited to a new thought...what IF...

we gave thanks for where God has us

we embraced His goodness to us in this difficult place and accepted the fact He has us here

we allowed Him to walk us through this time knowing He is with us for His purpose and glory...

and then it hit me...the weird envy, and I said to them, "this may be your purest Christmas yet. One where you truly worship the King Jesus. One without the distraction of what our culture has done to this most sacred gift."

We then engaged in God's Word where Gabriel shows up and speaks truth to Mary from Luke 1. Far beyond what she could comprehend (son of the Most High? Son of God?? the Holy Spirit will overshadow??? etc.!)...but not beyond what she could and would experience. She asks the obvious question: HOW? and she is given the only answer we can hold onto...'nothing is impossible with God.'

Have we become so arrogant to think we deserve an explanation for everything? That we have a right to comprehend all that God is doing and why? Am I willing to simply say, as Mary did, "I don't get it, but I'm yours, and I am willing to accept what You want (Luke 1:38 NLT)

Oh, to live in the mystery of the One who is beyond measure as the favored one, most blessed. Are you there?

Roadblocks

It’s so frustrating to hit a train or a detour on a road when you are trying to get somewhere in a timely fashion. Last week I was late to Teen Challenge because of a train parked on the tracks. That train tried to frustrate me and steal all my joy. Wow. I gave that train a lot of power. My goal was to get to TC, and I did, but I sure let that silly train mess with my head. I almost decided I shouldn’t even go.

Do you ever let people block your way to Jesus and frustrate you so much that you never reach Him? How it must grieve Him when His children stop seeking Him because of the behavior of other “Christians.” Those intolerant, judgmental, hypocritical, back biting believers park right in front of us and block our view. Then we lump them all together where pretty soon the whole church is one big nasty train that is going nowhere fast and we want nothing to do with it. “Let’s just go home.”

Yep. I’ve been there. I’ve let sin sick sinners like me keep me from the beauty of Jesus far too often. My own behavior and the behavior of my brothers and sisters has robbed my joy and made me sour (even toxic) more times than I care to admit. But, I’m learning to wait, or go around and make sure I reach the goal of seeing Jesus…because He is not like me. I am seeing how God loves the stubborn trains, even the train wrecks, and how He heals us with His abundant goodness. The fruit of that seeking is so sweet. Jesus set His face like a flint; fixed on the Father. Can you imagine if he let the ‘religious people’ sidetrack Him?

“I wait quietly before God, for my salvation (daily!) comes from Him. He alone is my rock and my salvation, my fortress where I will never be shaken.”

Psalm 62

Favorite Things!

Favorite Things

We had a sleepover with our grandsons the other night. At breakfast I asked Milo, “Do you know what my very favorite thing in all the world is?” And he said “what gg?” “Having a sleepover with you!” He smiled big and said, “me too.” Delightful.

Do you ever wonder what if feels like for God to delight in you as you delight in Him? I’m getting a taste and it is sweet.

I can’t imagine my grandsons running through the door and me saying, “okay, line up…here is the list of to-dos while you are here. Get to work!” Yes, we have disciplines we keep (eating, sleeping, cleaning up etc.), but those are not the basic disciplines of our relationship. Mainly we practice the discipline of celebration, rest, communion (talking to one another) and a few corrections of behavior along the way (my least favorite part).

I wonder how God enjoys my relationship with Him. He tells me He welcomes me as his special guest and anoints my head with oil. He prepares a feast for me and pursues me with goodness and unfailing love (Psalm 23). Wow. I hope I’m a grandma like Him. And, I hope I learn to delight in Him just like I see our grandsons delighting in time with us. My cup overflows!

The power of story: HIS story

I’ve been thinking a lot lately about why God chose to reveal His love through so many stories in the Bible, His Word. Why didn’t He just send us a list of dos and don’ts? Why didn’t He just tell us what He did for us on the cross and leave it at that? As I’ve been spending my Tuesday mornings with my sweet sisters at Teen Challenge I am absorbing how powerful His Word is through story. We are practicing ‘living in the text.’ Picturing what it might have been like and whom we relate to in the story and in what way. It has been such a powerful time. We aren’t looking for lessons or applications necessarily (although those come), we are entering into the relationships we observe and we are relating more intimately with Jesus each time.

Today we lingered in Mark 8:22-26 when Jesus takes a blind man by the hand out of the village and heals him in private. You need to rest there a while with Jesus to capture the beauty of this encounter. I dare you to.

As we interacted with this story, it came alive! All of us could see ourselves as the receivers of GREAT mercy as Jesus took our hand, led us out of the village and gave us sight. We ended our time together in tears as we listened to and sang an amazing song by Brian Johnson called “Love Came Down” (google him).

God uses story, because those stories are us and we are the recipients of amazing grace that we see over and over in the stories we read. God uses the power of story because our lives are His expression of our story with Him.

Crossing the bridge: next steps

Hi friends...so I've been working on this blog and trying to get it up to speed with where I am at these days. It (the blog and me) is a work in progress that I would love to get your feedback on. Check out the links to the right under INTIMACY REALIZED. I am stepping out in faith, trusting that the Shepherd is leading.

I want to help people experience an abiding relationship with Christ so we can show the world His love, His mercy, His compassion and His salvation. I think I am ready to cross this bridge, to take these next steps. I'm kind of nervous, the shadows scare me, but the light draws me.

why the blog name change

I decided to rename my blog...mostly cuz I think I am the only one who reads it, and I like to think these are conversations I'd love to have with people as we lingered on my front porch swing. Now there's all kinds of social networking (including blogs!), but I can imagine how it was when life was slower...people sat together, worked together, walked together, ate together, played together and lingered together. Like Jesus did with His disciples. I resist all the change, but, it is what it is. So, if you ever have time...come, sit a while and let's talk about what really matters.

Why am I afraid?

This fall God opened up a very uncomfortable door for me. Every Tuesday morning I get to go to the Teen Challenge women's chapel and 'teach.' Sitting in the pews each week are some of the most beaten down sisters I've ever been around in America. It's the type of situation where I can't even prepare a lesson like I used to when I taught so crisply through outlines. No, this is the real deal. Messy lives, broken hearts, rejected daughters, bleeding hearts. It reminds me of when I went to the refugee camp in Congo and felt so inadequate asking, "what do I have to give them?" Well, the answer was and is NOTHING. But, Jesus offers living bread and living water. He offers the truth that leads to freedom, gift wrapped in grace through His own flesh. So, every Tuesday morning we are embracing Jesus in all His abundance. We are listening to Him say things like, "don't be afraid. just trust Me (Mark 5:36)". These sisters are facing giants in their lives and Jesus is the One and Only way to be free of the strongholds.

So, I drive away wondering to myself...what giants am I avoiding? Where does God want to give me victory but I simply look the other way? As I'm begging these precious souls to believe Jesus, that He wants to heal, He wants to bless, He wants to restore the years the locusts have eaten...I hear the quiet Voice ask me, are you trusting? Three giants of anxiety I often battle are future, family, finances...the three F's all wrapped up in one...FEAR. Lots of complicated issues around all 3 (or so I say). How freeing to know that Jesus invites me every moment to abide in Him, listen to Him, learn from Him and do what He says as He leads me. He is gentle and humble and His yoke is easy. Which now begs the question...if I am not living easy, whose yolk am I carrying?

Seek first HIS kingdom and HIS right way of living and all these things...the NLT nails it this way:

Why be like the pagans who are so deeply concerned about these things?

Your heavenly Father already knows all your needs,

and He will give you all you need from day to day

if you live for Him and make the Kingdom of God your primary concern.

So don't worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will bring its own worries.

Today's trouble is enough for today.
Matthew 6:32-34

Where have I been?

The last year of my life with the Lord has been the most amazing EVER. I have not had any UNBELIEVABLE circumstances that showed me His majesty, in fact I've had some very difficult trials. No, it's been much more subtle and sweet than that. I've beheld Him in His sanctuary as David writes about. I am in the process of learning more and more about how He longs to be gracious and compassionate. He promises to lead and guide us, and He Shepherds us each step of our way. I am learning to simply pay attention. Where have I been? What took me SO long to see I was putting my life in  crazy boxes and waiting for the next new adventure box to show up!

Keeping in step with the Spirit all day long, eating His bread, drinking His water, being at rest in my heart is where I am living now...more often than not. All praise to God who by His grace transforms. We are always in process, always learning, always changing one way or the other. I long to change more and more into the image of our Sweet Jesus. Coming to Him everyday to rest, learn, eat and follow is the secret to Life in the Son. He invites us to COME. Are you?

Let's share bread! What has God been giving you lately? How is it with your soul? Are you more deeply in love with Jesus today than ever? If not, why not? Let's talk about it. He has SO much He wants to give you. I am praying for you today my friend.

I am Resting in the Son

I just learned a sweet chorus that goes like this...

I am resting in the Son

Resting in the work He's done

From His seed new life is born

By His power transformed.

Come Lord Jesus take me home,

I am yours and yours alone,

in your Presence, hold me safe,

now and forever I pray.

How is it with your soul? Are you resting in the Son, or are you striving? We are called to serve, but not strive. I've been learning to listen carefully to my thoughts, words and observe patterns that show strife, not peace. I am inviting the Lord to heal those broken places in me that cause me to strive and give me the power to surrender those places to Him and learn to rest in His Shepherding, His unfailing love, and His abundant goodness. I challenge you to pay close attention for the next 24 hours. Where does your mind get trapped? Will you let Jesus in there to unbind you and bring you to His rest? It takes intentionality on your part to go to the garden of your soul and wait on Him (see 30 Day Challenge), but the fruit of that resting soil is amazing! It is such freedom. He does the work! Are you resting in that truth? I'd love to hear how your journey is going as we walk together.

30 Day Challenge

The thirty day challenge is simply this: responding to Jesus' invitation in Matthew 11:28

"Come to Me all you who are weary and burdened and I will give you rest.

Take my yoke upon you and learn from Me, for I am gentle and humble in heart,

and you will find rest for your souls.

For my yoke is easy and my burden is light."

Come to Him with no agenda other than to learn from Him and rest. Come with whatever time you have.

This is your time to rest, not work.

Listed below are five simple ways to help you sit still.

Release: casting all your cares on Him (Psalm 62)

Rest: rest in the knowledge of His Sovereignty and love

Remain: meditate on a small portion of His Word, listening to His voice (John 15)

Resolve: make a decision to do what He says (James 1:22)

Review: before going to bed, take a few moments to think about your day;

recognizing His grace that carried you through. (Psalm 139)

If you would like to listen to the messages I taught leading up to this challenge, you can go to the

Hume website and click on podcasts; Spring Women's Retreat (www.humelake.org)

IT

Remember when you thought you had IT all figured out?
Remember when you realized you may have IT wrong?
Remember when you just had IT?
Remember when you finally said I can't take IT?
Remember when you realized IT is YOU?
Remember when you tried to hide IT?
Remember when you let IT die?
Remember the life that was born?
Remember FREEDOM?

You don't remember? Just wait...
He loves you too much to let you live in IT.

TRUST

Hi Friends,
Just checking in to see how you are doing in your 'rest' in the Lord. I am sensing the Lord urging me to deeper TRUST as I wait on Him. The Psalms encourage us over and over to seek His face always; seek His strength; and to trust Him at every moment. I want the blueprint! He wants faith without sight. Here is a simple acronym for TRUST that is helping me stay focused these days:

T: TODAY. Just focus on today. His goodness and mercy follows us all day long...today!
R: REPENT and REST. Repent of needing to know and rest in Him alone.
U: UNPLUG. Unplug from the world's system. Stop conforming to its patterns.
S: SEEK. Seek His kingdom first...before everyone and everything else in everyway
T: TRUST. period...in Him with all my heart and stop leaning on me (or anyone else!) Begin again!

As summer winds down and fall schedules kick in, you will be tempted to overcommit. Be still, wait, ask, and TRUST. I am praying for you sister!

Serving Out of Abundance even when it hurts...

I often find myself drawn back to John 15 where Jesus describes a life of ministry (we are ALL in ministry). He clearly lays out the need to ABIDE in Him so that He can bear His character out in us to offer sweet, redeeming fruit to a fallen world. What struck me recently is verse 2:

"He cuts off every branch in me that bears no fruit,

while every branch that does bear fruit He prunes so that it will bear

EVEN MORE FRUIT."

So, sometimes, where I think I'm doing great, thriving, bearing fruit...He chooses to prune there! And to remove what looks good to make it even more for His glory. My trouble is (and I think it's yours too), we want to resist those pruning shears. It hurts. We want to hold on to those pretty branches! But, our gardner is in control, and He asks us to submit to the shears so we can bear more fruit.  He doesn't let us get too comfortable, does He? He keeps us in a place of surrender, dependence and trust. I encourage you today to not fear His shear love. He wants to bring you complete joy (v. 10). Do you trust the gardner my fellow branch? He loves you so very much. Consider the lilies...

Day 30

I heard a sermon tonight taught by my friend, Jean Baptiste. Jean survived the Rwandan genocide of 1994, but many he loved did not. Jean knows what it is to face death and to suffer in ways I cannot begin to imagine. Tonight, he spoke with passion from deep within from Isaiah 6 about the holiness of God and how we are to worship Him for He is worthy. He reminded us that the Lord is on the throne in His Holy Temple. Being still before the King in the midst of this crazy, dark world fortifies our souls for what He has planned for us to do here for His glory. 

But the Lord is in His Holy Temple;

the Lord still rules from heaven.

He watches everyone closely, 

examining every person on earth...

the Righteous Lord loves justice.

The virtuous will see His face. (Psalm 11)

I pray that our times in the garden help us to see the Lord in all His glory. That we will not doubt His power and love. That we will rest secure in our knowledge of Him and that we will love justice as He does. May we shine for Him more and more as we cling to the One thing that matters.

Thank you for joining me for these 30 days! A few have asked if I am going to keep blogging. I will as the Lord leads. Look at this picture and hear the words of our brother David as He describes our sweet Savior...listen to how personal His walk was with His Lord...may we experience the same.

I love you Lord;

you are my strength.

The Lord is my rock, in whom I find protection.

He is my shield, the power that saves me, 

and my place of safety. (Psalm 18)

Day 29

I'm a bit late getting this post on today. I had my 3 grandsons spend the night with me last night (3,2,1) and went to a baby shower this morning. So, I have young lives on my mind. Things have changed a lot in the baby accessory world since I had mine, but the hearts that love those babies still long for the same thing (no matter how old they are!). We want safety, protection, happiness, health, faith, purpose etc. for those we love. Those are great things to pray for, and we should keep making our requests known to our Abba. But, isn't it comforting to know, that no matter how it looks to us right now, God has ordained each day, has allowed each trial, and has created each heart for Himself...we can rest in that truth even when our own hearts are breaking. Life is full of thrills and throws all at the same time. It is never stagnant. What can become solid is the state of our souls at rest in Christ. Our solitude, our silence, our community and our service all come from a heart united with its Creator. I think this is what Peter was speaking to when God spoke through him saying:

By His diving power, God has given us everything we need for living a godly life.

We have received all of this by coming to know Him,

the One who called us to Himself by means of His marvelous glory and excellence.

And because of His glory and excellence, He has given us great and precious promises.

These are the promises that enable you to share His diving nature

and escape the world's corruption caused by human desires. (1 Peter 1:3-4)

What more do we need? Be still.

Day 28

Wow, the 30 days are almost over! Not sure how many are still hanging in here with me, so if you are...welcome again. Jesus loves your presence in His. He delights in you! Isn't that amazing. He wants to honor you, build you up, encourage you, strengthen you and give you His full joy. What a Savior. Every day we live out the cross with Him. The gospel of grace isn't a one time decision, but it is a daily living in the power of that sacrifice. Thank You Jesus for the grace that sustains us everyday! We are hidden with Christ in God. What mind can conceive??? Oh, the depths of His grace. As you sit silently in His presence, let the reality of His grace soak deeply into your soul. There is nothing you can't do in Christ, no pain you can't endure, no disappointment you can't absorb and no injury you can't receive healing for, no sin too big for his forgiveness and restoration. His grace is all sufficient. Don't suffer alone, invite Him in. Let Him carry your sin and sorrow everyday, and let Him pour out His Spirit of power through you. To pray without ceasing means living in this present Reality. What an adventure!

Be joyful always; pray continually;

give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus.

Do not put out the Spirit's fire, do not treat prophecies with contempt. 

Test everything. Hold on to the good. Avoid every kind of evil. 

May God Himself, the God of peace, sanctify you through and through 

(not our work! His grace).

May your whole spirit, soul and body be kept blameless at the coming of our Lord Jesus Christ.

The One who calls you is faithful and HE WILL DO IT.

(1 Thess. 5:16-24)

Have you questioned what God's will is for your life? There it is. He'll direct your path, you trust in THIS God. 

Day 27

Lord Jesus, You prepare a table for me

in the presence of all that is against me! You give me everything I need.

Your goodness and Your amazing love follow me

Always! Everyday! Every moment!!!

And, as if that's not enough...

I will live with You now and FOREVER!

Friends, if that is not HOPE and if that does not breathe rest into your soul...what is and what does??? Only ONE thing is needed and He will never be taken from us. Praise You Abba!

Day 26

I'm going through a lot of transition in my personal and vocational life...this can lead to anxiety to say the least. My mind wants to fret about the future and worry about all the "what ifs" ahead. Life is changing all the time, isn't it? As I'm becoming more honest with who I am, how I strive outside of the Spirit and how drawn I am to my own selfish ambitions, I see my desperate need of the Good Shepherd's rod and staff to comfort and discipline me for His name's sake. I want to chart my own course and make sure all the safety nets are in place; but that is not walking by faith. I am grateful for David's example and words of comfort and truth as I pray with him...

You are my Shepherd, I have everything I need.

You make me lie down in green pastures,

You lead me beside quiet waters...YOU restore my soul.

You guide me in your paths of righteousness for Your name's sake.

Even tho I live in this sin sick broken world, I won't fear,

for You are with me.

Your rod and your staff comfort me.

Sweet Shepherd, I draw near to You this morning...help me to be in tune with Your still small Voice all day long as I trust You to lead me. I praise You from the depths of my heart! Thank You Abba.

Day 24

One of my favorite passages to dwell in is from John 17 as Jesus is praying for His followers the night of His betrayal. To think He knew what was about to happen and He denies Himself and prays for us. We truly were on His mind and in His heart from beginning to end. Meditating on this prayer gives my soul rest. Knowing that God in the flesh prays His will for me...praise You Father...let this seed take root and bear Your image as You prayed...

"I'm not asking You to take them out of the world,

but to keep them safe from the evil one.

They are not part of this world any more than I am.

Make them pure and holy by teaching them Your words of truth.

As you sent Me into the world, I am sending them into the world.

And I give myself entirely to You so they also might be

entirely yours." (John 17:15-19)

Listen to the ONE-ness of us with Jesus. He gave all of Himself to make us all His. No wonder He said we can't be in the middle. He didn't half-way die. Oh Lord, we need your grace to help us live in the reality of our new identity everyday. Thank You for Your patience. May we go into the world today clothed in You.

John 17:22 "I have given them the glory You gave me, so that they may be one, as we are---"